Excuses, Excuses!

I finally understand the fatigue - it's caused by Ketosis, which sounds like a damn scary thing to me! But, if I understand what is going on and learn how to manage it, I should be okay. I guess it's something that most people go through, who are doing Atkins, so I assume it's not too bad. Though, if chugging a bottle of maple syrup will help, maybe I should consider it!

Today has been another hard day...so far. (Boo-hoo, poor me!) This morning I woke up to realize that there was nothing in the house I could eat, other than some frozen beef and chicken, and I did not feel like defrosting and then cooking anything. (Fatigue!) So, I decided to make myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, which is not something I should be eating while on Atkins. I knew, whole-heartedly, what I was doing was wrong, and I felt extremely guilty. So, I went in to show Keith what I had done - I knew he would let me have it. Now, in most cases, if he told me what I should and should not eat, I would chew his head right off, but when I started this diet, I told him to keep me in check. I need him to keep me in check.

Even though I knew what his reaction would be (because I told him what his reaction should be in case I did something of the sort) I still got mad at him, but I was really just mad at myself. And, like a 3 year old, I threw my sandwich across the kitchen and stomped off to my bedroom. After a few minutes of pouting, I got up, defrosted the chicken, cooked it and ate it - and it was delicious. Far better than a heart-burn inducing PB&J!

But, back to not having any food in the house. It's hard to keep what I need on hand. I run a pretty tight ship when it comes to our monthly budget and I feel that buying all this extra stuff that I need is a bit excessive. It adds up! Especially when I am the only one eating most of it! So, that's just another frustrating part to the whole thing, but it could be just an excuse. It reminds me of Celebrity Rehab. They continue to come up with excuse after excuse as to why they should leave the program...'there are surveillance cameras watching me undress', 'someone is being mean to me', 'I cannot stand the constant bickering', etc., etc. I can hear myself in those pathetic people...'there is not anything to eat here', 'it's too expensive', 'I don't have any energy'.

So, that's my day in a nutshell, and, it's all I can type for now. I am just soooo tired.

Excuses, excuses...